Friday. He'd be gone for the whole weekend. I always felt like it would tear me apart. And he'd be worried about me. He often stayed on borrowed time, find some excuse for his wife so he could be with me for another few minutes.
Me: I'll be fine
AD: :(
AD: I appreciate that babe
AD: I shouldn't be putting you through this
AD: I'll be really upset when you find your next boyfriend, but even more pleased
Me: How often do I have to ask you to go until you do? :P
AD: Another dozen times
Me: Please go
Me: Please go
Me: Please go
Me: Please go
Me: Please go
Me: Please go
Me: Pleaso go
Me: Please go
Me: Please go
Me: Please go
Me: Please go
Me: Please go
AD: Ha
Me: There you go
AD: You make me laugh
Me: Still not gone?
AD: Nope
Me: so you've lied
AD: :p
Me: I've asked you another dozen times, yet you're still here
AD: Smartass
Me: you know how it's important for a Dom to follow through? :P
AD: You know how it's important for a sub to remember her place? :p
Me: I need you to go, seriously.
AD: For me or you?
Me: Both, I think
AD: Okay
Me: There's a huge part of me that wants you to stay, but I can't have that
AD: Babe, if this is causing you so much discomfort, I really think you need to reassess
AD: Is it really worth the grief?
AD: I feel like its every week that it upsets you :(
Me: talk to you soon, ok? x
AD: And I don't blame you one bit
AD: Ok
Me: have a great night
AD: Thanks. Have a great day
Me: bye x
AD: Bye x
Yes. I am a naive, pathetic, stupid bitch - but does that sound like someone who's playing me? Does this really sound like someone who's bullshitting me?
I've been going through a lot of our conversations in my head. And they were all like this.
Despite everything, I miss him so much. And I am afraid to admit it because, well, how pathetic am I?
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